But Even So…

Artist Statement

But Even So…

My drawings of mothers and their children visualizes the relationship between self-image and a recollection of beloved maternal figures. These drawings converge a quiet realism and a sense of loss, mortality, and memory. I use mark making as a means to envision a new space for personal healing, and to reimagine my subjects beyond forgotten figures of past lives. In a virtual palimpsest, I focus on recreating the remembered loved one with a softness, with charcoal, that contrasts with the more distinct work, in pen and ink, depicting the child. Situating my subjects in quiet settings, this recent work employs purposeful mark making within the context of memory and long forgotten figures. 

The title of this body of work, But Even So… was chosen based on a haiku written by Kobayashi Issa (小林 一茶, 1763 – 1828):

“It is true

That this world of dew 

Is a world of dew. 

But even so…”

This translation breaks the haiku format, but it is still a haunting poem that has remained in my heart since the recent loss of my mother. This poem has, with words, described the brokenheartedness and hope that I often feel when I create my drawings. Breathing life into my figures with every line - and with every stroke I widdle out another story. Often these stories reflect the imagined rhythm I feel when navigating the tumult of my own grief. There is a secret patience in the blank paper and the potential of the charcoal where I can tear the veil anew and protect a sacred space filled to the brim with vulnerability and love. Drawing these reimagined figures, I reflect on the nature of being remembered with all of their imperfections and subtleties. This work tempers heavier subjects with contemplative serenity even though the subjects are often ambiguous, inviting multiple readings. Embedded in the titles are questions that I wish I could ask my mother, as well as questions submitted as part of my art installation at Baton Rouge Gallery in July 2022. 

Reflecting on these questions, I have created several works in this series with deliberate imperfections. Reflecting that the truly difficult experiences in life are the most powerful events that connect us. My contemplations on the dynamics of distance and closeness, of time passing, and memory are all reflected in these imperfect renderings of the human condition. As the dew slips away in the light of a new day, and a loved one slips away, we might find it difficult to embrace the bittersweetness… But even so…